“Going Backward, Moving Forward”

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Hello.  First off, I'm seventeen and was raised Episcopal.  Just until recently, about eight months ago, I lost my faith.  I began challenging the Lord and His true existence.  I experimented in other religions.  I am ashamed to say that in my teenage angst and anger, I looked into Satanism and Nihilism.  I am ashamed to say that I have denied my belief in the Lord and Jesus Christ to many people who have asked me if I hold faith.  I have sinned greatly in various ways.

Now, as I am preparing to move out, possibly join the military, and become more independent – I wish for the Lord to enter my life once again.  The problem is that I feel that I am not worthy, and the Lord has already damned me to hell.  I have never cursed the Holy Spirit, but I still think that if the Lord were smart enough, He would have abandoned me already.  So my question is: am I far from salvation and redemption?  Is there ever a way that I can have God back on my side and His love in my heart?  I want Him to hear my prayers and hear my praises.

Sincerely,
Seeking His Love

Dear Seeking His Love,

God doesn’t desire anyone to perish in hell.  Jesus came to die for the sins of the whole world (Jhn 3:16).  God specifically says that if someone returns from their wicked ways, He will forgive them (Ezek 18:21-23).  We return to God through faith in His Son and repentance of our old lives (Acts 20:21).  Take the enthusiasm that you regret spending on Satanism, Nihilism, etc. and apply it to following every word of the Bible (Rom 10:17).  Christianity is about more than just calling upon the Lord (Matt 7:21-23); it is about letting His Word guide our lives.  If you are a part of a congregation that is devoted to Bible loyalty (1 Tim 3:15 – not all congregations are faithful to the Bible; we would be happy to help you find a church in your area), and you have done what the Bible says you must do to be saved (read “What Must I Do To Be Saved” for specifics on that subject), then you will be able to comfortably say that God hears your prayers, and your sins are forgiven.

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