“Prayer Requests”

Monday, May 07, 2018

I need some advice, please.  In our congregation, we begin midweek Bible class by taking prayer requests; after which, a prayer is offered by one of the men.  I am becoming increasingly uncomfortable with some of the prayers that are being requested and offered.  Some of the members request prayers for family and friends who are unbelievers and experiencing issues such as surgeries, pregnancy complications, injuries, illness, financial difficulties, etc.  One member has asked several times that her mom, who has shown no interest whatsoever in coming to church, might find a job and for her sister whose baby was born premature to be able to deal with the stress and worry.  However, this is the second baby her sister has born out of wedlock with two different men.  She frequents the local bars and continues live with her boyfriend who fathered this most recent baby.  My question is: should we be offering prayers for unbelievers other than that they repent and turn from their sins?  I am really uncomfortable about the prayers being offered that ask God to heal, comfort, and "be with" these family members and friends who continue to live in sin.  Praying for the health of a baby or child is one thing, but praying for grown adults who give no indication they are interested in repenting and getting the sin out of their life...?  Privately, I pray that the trials these people are having will cause them to draw closer to God and change their lives.  But how do I handle this situation where public prayer is being offered?  Do I pray – or pretend to pray – with the group when I feel like we are praying for something displeasing to God?  As a single woman, I don't know how to go about expressing my concerns without coming off as being critical or unsubmissive to the men's leadership.  One complication is that several of the members requesting these prayers are young adults and recent converts.  However, some, including the men offering prayers, have been in the church for years and appear to be okay with it all.  Am I way off base, and if I'm not, how do I handle this?  Please help.

Sincerely,
Keeping My Head Down

Dear Keeping My Head Down,

Your concerns are valid, and praying for unbelievers is also valid.  The verses that will answer your concerns are 1 Tim 2:1-4.  Those four verses lay out God’s attitude toward praying for unbelievers.  First and foremost, we are told to pray for all men (1 Tim 2:1).  That is a very clear verse on the subject.  It is appropriate, necessary, and godly to pray for all human beings.  1 Tim 2:2 says that we are even to pray for politicians!  It may be a little tongue-in-cheek to say, but most folks don’t think much of the lifestyles and attitudes of politicians, and yet, we are told to pray for their well-being and success.  God is so adamant that prayers ought to be offered on behalf of all men that 1 Tim 2:3 specifically says, “This is good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior”.  So take comfort, praying for unbelievers is the right thing to do, and you can comfortably join in the congregational prayers offered on their behalf.

Now, we also said that your concerns are valid – that is where 1 Tim 2:4 comes in.  1 Tim 2:4 points out that the ultimate goal is to save souls.  If everyone is blessed with creature comforts, but their souls are lost in the end – it was a waste (Matt 16:26).  Sometimes people need catastrophes to bring them closer to God, and sometimes people convert because they knew the church was praying for them, and that prayer was answered.  So how do we know who and what to pray for?!  One option is to only pray for the people that we feel are “worthy”… but that sure puts us in the position of being judge and jury, doesn’t it (Jas 4:10-12)?  The other option is to pray for all and always remember to have the attitude of “Lord willing”.  Jas 4:13-15 says that whatever we do, we should pray that the Lord’s will would come first.  It is good to pray for all people, but we should also always have the attitude that God’s will should supersede our own desires.  If at some point the congregation isn’t showing that attitude of humility in the congregational prayers, you will have a problem, but if we always remember that the goal is to save souls and the Lord knows best, it is a wonderful thing to pray for all men.

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