“Breaking The Chains”

Saturday, July 06, 2013

I've been married for over a decade and born again for that long also, but there is a sinful problem in my life.  I haven't physically slept with anyone, but I struggle with flirting, porn, and putting myself in compromising situations.  I talked to many people (pastors, friends, etc., even my wife).  I still haven't overcome it yet.  I exhausted these talks with my wife; it's starting to bring her down, so now, I keep it to myself.  Is there any hope of freedom for me, or am I stuck this way for life?  If you can help me, write back, please.

Sincerely,
Enslaved

Dear Enslaved,

The Bible makes several statements about sexual sins and how to avoid them:

1. Flee fornication (1 Cor 6:18).  Keeping yourself out of compromising situations is a logistical decision.  Put accountability software like Covenant Eyes on your computer and only use it in a public area.  Stay away from social situations and places that are a temptation.  In short, don’t put yourself somewhere where you can make a bad decision.
2. Replace bad habits with good ones (Lk 11:24-26).  Make a decision to court and flirt with your wife.  Find joy in the wife of your youth (Pr 5:18).  Make it your personal campaign to rekindle the joy and happiness of your marriage.  Take all of that wasted energy and apply it to a godly romance.  Your current choices are destroying your wife and marriage… this will do the exact opposite.

These two habits are stressed over and over again in the Scriptures.  The last thing that we would recommend is what you are already doing.  By using this site and talking to others, you are surrounding yourself with good counsel (Pr 15:22).

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