How can I prove to my husband that God is real?  He says there is no proof and that I may as well believe in aliens.  He also says that God is just a story that people made up, just like any other god like Buddha.  We have been arguing about this for a couple of months, and I’m beginning to think that God isn’t real because I cannot prove Him at all… in any kind of way. And praying isn’t helping; I’ve prayed and prayed and – nothing.  What do I do other than pray?

Sincerely,
Not A Debater

Dear Not A Debater,

We recommend that you stop talking to your husband about this subject and hand him a list of books to read.  If he reads them, you will know that he is honestly seeking answers... if he doesn't, you can know that he just likes to poke fun at religious people (in which case, you shouldn’t waste your time discussing the issue with him anyway!).  We also recommend you take the time to read these books for your own personal growth and comfort.  There are thousands of logical reasons to believe in the existence of God... and the more we learn about the world around us, the more we find Rom 1:20 to be true.  The whole creation screams of His existence.  Here are a list of books and videos that we find worth reading and watching.

1)    Has God Spoken? by A.O. Schnabel

2)    Case For A Creator by Lee Strobel

3)    Evidence That Demands A Verdict by Josh McDowell

4)    Expelled with Ben Stein

5)    The Mysterious Island with Doug Phillips

6)    Answers with Ken Ham

This is hardly an exhaustive list, but it is a good beginning point for your husband’s investigation into spiritual matters.  Hopefully, he has an honest heart and is willing to search out the matter.

[This question is a follow-up to “A Thanksgiving To Remember”]

Why is it so important to apologize to others?  I know it is important to apologize to God… but other people when they do you wrong also?  Why can't others just forget about it, sweep it under a rug so to speak?

Sincerely,
Get Over It

Dear Get Over It,

It is important because God says it is important (Lk 17:4).  Confessing our sins to one another is part of the growth process that God expects us to go through (Jas 5:16).  Heb 10:24 says that we need to consider one another… and that is part of what apologizing is.  An apology shows that you have considered the feelings of the other person after you have wronged them.  Admitting we are wrong is a sign of maturity and humility (Matt 23:12).  Love seeks the benefit of the other person (1 Cor 13:5) – apologizing helps those we have hurt to heal.

I have got a question about “we reap what we sow”.  I can’t seem to understand this.  It seems that if this were true… how come some people that are really "bad or sinful" get really great lives and seem to have such great luck while some people give to the needy and help people all their lives and always seem to have bad things happen to them?  It would seem that this “we reap what we sow” would not let that happen.  Sometimes I would see someone (for example) lie to get a job, and I would think that one day it would come back to bite them, but after years of them getting everything (it seems all that they ever wanted), I start to wonder.  I do believe in “we reap what we sow”, but I just don’t understand why it only seems to work for some people.  I’m sure this is a question a lot of people wonder about; that is another reason why I am asking it.  Thanks and God bless!

Sincerely,
Small Harvest

Dear Small Harvest,

It is a question that a lot of people ask, and the answer is “consider their latter end”.  In Ps 73:3-12, the psalmist, Asaph, ponders why it is that wicked people prosper and the righteous are downtrodden.  The question vexed him deeply because his enemies succeeded while he, a godly man, was constantly in pain (Ps 73:13-14).  Eventually, Asaph went to the temple and thought about the end of a wicked man’s life (Ps 73:16-17).

A life of wickedness is a slippery slope – one lie leads to another until all you have is a tangle of lies and deception (Ps 73:18).  The wicked man has no peace because he is totally dependent upon his own strength and wiles for success… every moment of life is lived upon a precipice (Ps 73:19).

Contrast that life to one of a righteous man.  God holds the hand of the righteous, so they will not despair (Ps 73:23), and God is a righteous man’s counselor and friend (Ps 73:24).  Ultimately, the righteous go to heaven, and the wicked spend eternity in hell (Ps 73:25).

It may seem like wicked people prosper, but eventually, their wickedness becomes their downfall.  Sometimes their sins take years to catch up with them (pay attention to some of the latest headlines in politics and Hollywood), but they always do.  If a man becomes wealthy through evil… he may have money, but he won’t have peace.  As Pr 15:17 points out, a wealthy feast filled with hatred isn’t nearly as enjoyable as a humble meal eaten with loving friends.  Financial prosperity is not synonymous with happiness.  Gal 6:7 is always true… but you and I may not always see the sorrow and suffering that goes on behind closed doors.

This is a follow-up question to (Etymological Enlightenment).

Then would it have been fine for me to have had a hundred sexual partners before I decided to settle down with one woman, since it’s not adultery?  It’s like there is no punishment for the sin of premarital sex in our modern society, but if I were to have been with one woman in my life and was married to her, and I then divorce her… the church condemns me for it???  But as I mentioned above, sex with a hundred women is okay so long as I wasn’t married to any of them?  That’s a church (people) being hypocritical I think!

Sincerely,
Sin Should Cost

Dear Sin Should Cost,

The Scriptures condemn both behaviors.  Both are equally wrong.  Divorce is wrong, and premarital sex is wrong.  We are not condemning one behavior more or less than the other.  Don't mistake us, both sins are equally wrong.  All sin is worthy of death (Rom 6:23) and can only be forgiven when we turn, repent, and choose a new life in Christ (Gal 2:20).

I have often wondered: is sex before marriage adultery?

Sincerely,
Term Specific

Dear Term Specific,

Sex before marriage is fornication, but it isn’t adultery.  Adultery is the act of polluting a marriage (Heb 13:4).  All adultery is fornication, but not all fornication is adultery.  It is possible to be sexually immoral (‘fornication’ means ‘sexual immorality’) without being married, but it is impossible to commit adultery without having a spouse.