5 minutes a day 5 days a week - a year of Bible Wisdom

This is kind of a two-part question.  Is it ever okay to be angry with God?  For years, I've found myself feeling this way due to my issues of trying to turn away from having strong attractions and feelings towards members of the same sex.  Yes, I know this is condemned and all, and I can tell you that this issue is the only true reason I'm depressed.  It's not just the attraction though.  I really hate being a man – period.  All I want to do is please God, but if He doesn't make any mistakes, why couldn't He have made me a woman?  I would see then that I could satisfy Him and maybe have a little happiness inside of me.  All of this is what is making me feel frustrated.  (Oh, and I also know that everyone says that homosexuality is a choice, but I can assure you, I didn't choose to be attracted to men.  I lived a "normal" childhood with both a mother and father and was never sexually abused or anything like that).  Why is God making me suffer?

Sincerely,
Torn In Two

Dear Torn In Two,

Living a homosexual lifestyle is a choice – there is more debate over whether the attraction is a choice.  Feel free to read our article “Just Another Sin” to see more on the difference between homosexual attractions and living a sinful homosexual lifestyle.

Whether or not it is okay to be angry with God… it is normal – especially during times of great stress and trial.  Jonah was angry and spoke rashly with God, and God condemned him for it (Jon 4:1-4).  Regardless of how we feel, we must be careful to not speak rashly with or about God.  Like children with their parents, we can get upset, but we can’t be disrespectful.

You have a thorn in the flesh, a mental/physical problem that is causing you great distress.  However, God will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able (1 Cor 10:13).  Everyone has trials and weaknesses in various areas of their character and life.  Your temptation is one that you must fight just like any other… but take hope.  God causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him (Rom 8:28).  Many others have tried and succeeded in winning the battle against homosexuality.  You can too.  We cannot imagine the struggle you are going through, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be helped.  Through many tribulations, we must enter the kingdom of heaven (Acts 14:22).  This is your cross to bear, but you can do it (Lk 14:27).  If you would like a congregation in your area to get in contact with, e-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org, and we will help you as you reach out for help in your journey.

5 minutes a day 5 days a week - a year of Bible Wisdom

(This question is a follow-up to “Charles In Charge?”)

What is the role of the woman in the church?  Is she supposed to just sit and give tithes and offerings, or is she supposed to be active in ministries of the church?  The church is Christ's body, so the church is the people, right?

Sincerely,
Want To Be A Worker

Dear Want To Be A Worker,

Just because women don’t lead in the public assembly, doesn’t mean that they just take up pew space and write checks!  The Bible is chock-full of examples of active and vibrant godly women.  Lydia was a christian who took Paul and gave him lodging, food, and financial support (Acts 16:14-15).  Priscilla and Aquila were a married couple that taught the gospel to Apollos (Acts 18:24-26).  That same Apollos went on to become a mighty preacher… something that would have never happened without Priscilla.  John Mark’s mother opened her home for a prayer meeting that saved Peter’s life (Acts 12:11-12).

Older women are supposed to be teachers and train the younger women to be faithful wives and mothers (Tit 2:3-5).  Younger women have the immensely important task of raising godly children… the next generation of christians (Tit 2:4).  Women have children’s classes to teach, women’s classes to teach, hospitality to provide, others to encourage, and evangelism to do.

On top of all those very important and pivotal roles within the church, during the worship services, women have the task of singing and praising God (just like the men – Col 3:16) and joining in the public prayer… just because one man leads the prayer doesn’t mean we aren’t all praying together.  When the church assembles, we all are worshipping God, edifying each other, and studying His Word (Heb 10:24-25).

And yes, the church is the people – not the building.  The word ‘church’ actually means ‘the called out’.  The church is composed of those who have heard the call of Christ and have come out of the world to serve Him.

(This is a follow-up question to “Women Preachers”)

We are to remain silent and ask our husbands?  What about women's Bible study groups where we ask someone other than our husband a question?  Aren't we also, according to John, to cover our heads?  Is this not just a cultural bias of the time in which this was written?  There is no precedence that has made it past the Nicene council as to what books are canonical and which are not.  Did Jesus not love Mary Magdalene (and kiss her on the ...?), that somehow got written off as a prostitute, so that males can continue to dominate?  Why should it be that because God chose to make me a woman that I am second class to a man?  Why should it not be that He created me to be just as smart, capable, and able to lead as a man?  Doesn't God only care about our spirit and not our anatomical parts?

Sincerely,
The Feminist

Dear The Feminist,

Before we address your question, let’s get one thing straight – the Bible is complete, and there aren’t any books left out.  Read “Books of the Apocrypha” to better understand that topic.  If we don’t at the very minimum agree that the Bible is written exactly as God intended, we have no common ground with which to have a sensible discussion.  There is ZERO reason to believe that Jesus had a relationship with Mary Magdalene… that is just apocryphal mumbo-jumbo.

Now, on to your question regarding men’s and women’s roles.  You have a lot of disinformation that is coloring your question.  God doesn’t treat women as second-class citizens – they are equal heirs of salvation (1 Pet 3:7).  Women don’t need to have their heads covered – their long hair is their covering (1 Cor 11:15).  Women are also welcome to ask questions in Bible studies – the command of 1 Cor 14:34-35 pertains to the church assembly, not individual classes.  Men and women are created different, but equal.  God has designed men and women to complement each other – Adam and Eve were a pair that were incomplete if separated (Gen 2:20).  God doesn’t care about our gender… He cares about whether we are willing to fulfill the role He has given us in this life.