I am a christian woman whose husband left in January.  At that time, we were not living as christians.  Since then, I have committed to the Lord.  My husband was gone for four months and started an affair and lived with another woman.  He asked me to reconcile and forgive him, and he has repented to God.  He is in church now.  Do I still have a biblical right for a divorce because I am having great difficulty in this marriage now, or am I obligated because of his repentance?

Sincerely, Heart Sick

Dear Heart Sick,

Divorce is always a horrible thing, but yes – you have a right to divorce him because of his adultery. The Bible is clear that God hates divorce (Mal 2:16). God intends for a man and a woman to remain together for a lifetime (Mk 10:7-9). However, God has made provision for a situation soiled by adultery. In the case of adultery, a husband or wife has the right to divorce their spouse (Matt 19:9). It is a painful decision to make, but yes, you do have the option. You will have to prayerfully weigh whether or not to use it.

My pastor preaches that we are predestined (Eph 1:5). If this is true, then what is the point of serving God? For example, there is a Heaven and a Hell. God knows all of us; our goods, our bads, our evil intents, and our godly works. He knows our hearts, our minds, and our souls.  The Bible says that God knows each hair on our head. So why try to win a race that God has chosen for us to win or lose, knowing that no matter how hard we try, we are not going to get the prize?

What do I mean? I have four kids, three girls and one boy. I have my kids run a foot race. My youngest daughter wins the race, but my son comes in last. I announce that the loser gets the prize. I have another race; my son comes in first. This time, I announce that the prize is given to the first place winner. I have a third race, and my son comes in third; I announce that the prize goes to the third place winner. After a while, the others catch on to the scheme that no matter what place they come in, it was predetermined and predestined for my son to win.

My wife is abusive, and my pastor tells me that I should "go through it for God" and that Jesus took it so "who am I to not go through it?”.

I am an inch away from giving up on religion all together. Am I missing something?

Sincerely, Deciding My Own Destiny

Dear Deciding My Own Destiny,

Yes, you are missing something – the Truth. Your pastor is wrong. The doctrine of ‘specific predestination’ is a man-made idea. If God specifically chooses certain people to be saved, then Jesus didn’t really die for everyone… but the Bible says He did (Jhn 3:16-17). It also means that God punishes people for things they have no control over… but the Bible says you have a choice (Josh 24:15). It also would mean that God doesn’t want everyone to be saved… but the Bible says He does (Ezek 18:23).

It is true that God predestined something before He created the universe. He predestined how people would be saved – in Christ (Eph 1:5). God planned, before He made anything, that all of mankind would be saved in Christ (Jhn 14:6). God chose how you would be saved; you must choose whether you will accept His salvation. The doctrine of predestination is a man-made lie that robs people of their hope, their freewill service to God, and the truth. If God decided specifically who was going to be saved before He ever created the world, then what is the point of Him commanding us to follow His Word (Jhn 15:14)? He commands us to follow because He wants us to choose to follow.

I’m very sorry to hear of your marital problems. Without knowing the specifics, I cannot give you any particular advice, but I can say that I wouldn’t trust advice from a religious leader who teaches false doctrine. Don’t give up on religion; give up on false religion. For an overview of what to look for in a faithful church, see this previous post.

Feel free to e-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org if you would like help finding a faithful congregation in your area.

When I was going to a youth conference on the weekend, I was reading the Bible in the book of Acts. I found Acts 2:17-21.

I knew this verse had something to do with the weekend. When we stopped at a coffee shop, I told my friend about the verse, and she thought it was amazing. When we were at the main session of the youth conference, the preacher used this verse… does this have any spiritual meaning?

Sincerely, Acting on Acts

Dear Acting on Acts,

The coincidence of the preacher using this verse aside, every Bible verse has a spiritual meaning and significance. Acts 2:17-21 is an excerpt from Peter’s sermon on the day of Pentecost, the very first sermon preached after Christ ascended into heaven. Peter is quoting the book of Joel (Joel 2:28-32) and stating that what Joel wrote about was happening now. The verses have nothing to do with our behavior today or the end of time. If someone uses those verses to talk about speaking in tongues, modern day prophecy, visions, or the end of the world – they are misusing the Bible. Those verses refer to that particular day and the time period surrounding Christ’s life and death. Let me explain the context.

For 400 years, the Jews had received no word from God - no prophets, no visions, no dreams, nothing. Then, after all that silence came:

1. Zacharias and the angel (Lk 1:13)
2. Elizabeth’s prophecy (Lk 1:41)
3. Simeon’s prophecy (Lk 2:26)
4. Anna’s prophecy (Lk 2:36)
5. The vision of the shepherds (Lk 2:8-9)
6. John the Baptist’s preaching (Matt 3:1)
7. Jesus’ miracles (Jhn 2:11)
8. The miracles of Jesus’ seventy disciples (Lk 10:17)

There was a veritable explosion of supernatural events. Peter is explaining how this influx of miracles, visions, and prophecy were a fulfillment of what Joel had said would happen in the last days of Israel. ‘In the last days’ doesn’t mean the end of the world in this circumstance; it means the end (or last days) of the Old Covenant. Peter is using these verses from the book of Joel to illustrate that Jesus really is the Messiah that the Jews had been waiting for. Jesus fulfilled Joel’s prophecy, and today we reap the benefits of it.

I was reading a question to a priest, and I asked him why we call him ‘father’ when it specifically says not to in the Bible (Matt 23:8). His response was that it is for the same reason a child calls their parent ‘father’; they are the natural father and the priest is the spiritual father. While I believe calling a priest ‘father’ is wrong, why is it okay to call our birth parent ‘father’?

Sincerely, Paternal Nomenclature

Dear Paternal Nomenclature,

Calling a priest ‘father’ is wrong because, as the priest said, it is referring to ‘father’ in a spiritual sense. That is what Christ is condemning in Matt 23:8-10. Christ is rebuking people who elevate themselves above others within the church. Catholic priests place themselves in a position of spiritual superiority and authority above others. That is wrong and exactly what Christ told His disciples never to do.

On the other hand, the term ‘father’ is perfectly fine when used to refer to a physical parent. The Bible itself uses the word ‘father’ almost 1,000 times, and the vast majority of those times refer to fleshly parents. Gen 2:24, Gen 9:22, Lev 20:9, Pr 17:25, Mk 10:29, Lk 11:11 are just a few examples. Our fathers are a blessing from God given to us for a time to guide and discipline us (Heb 12:9-10). They are worthy of honor and the title ‘father’ (Eph 6:2).

You have already given an excellent answer to a question about the NIV version, but I have another question. Someone once told me that the NIV was sinful because it supported babies going to hell. If so, where and how?

Sincerely, Truth In Translation

Dear Truth in Translation,

The chapter in question is Romans chapter 8, and the phrase in question is ‘sinful nature’. The New International Version (NIV) translators use the phrase ‘sinful nature’ throughout Romans chapter 8 when all the major strict translations use the word ‘flesh’. The Greek word is ‘sarkos’ which literally means ‘flesh’. The transdenominational council (see previous post for more details) felt that ‘sinful nature’ better represented the idea that all human beings are born in sin… thus unbaptized babies would go to hell.

This blatant abuse of power by the NIV translators is used to propagate a denominational doctrine. When viewed through the NIV translation, Romans chapter 8 seems to specifically endorse the idea that all humans are born with a sinful nature - when in reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Sin is a choice, not a genetic flaw (Gen 4:6-7).