In Psalms 111:9, it says that ‘Reverence’ is His Name.  So why are so many preachers adding ‘Reverend’ to their name?  Isn't pastor or minister enough of a title?  And the thing is, so many are living ungodly lives (however sin is sin in all of us).  Should we not honor God's name as reverent?

Sincerely,
Keeping ‘Holy’ Holy

Dear Keeping ‘Holy’ Holy,

God specifically condemns religious leaders who take titles that put them on the same level as Him (Matt 23:8-10).  Many religious leaders are power-hungry and fixated upon receiving the honor of others.  Jesus rebuked the Pharisees for this very same arrogant attitude (Matt 6:1-2).  Preachers are only men; they shouldn’t place themselves above others.

This is kind of a two-part question.  Is it ever okay to be angry with God?  For years, I've found myself feeling this way due to my issues of trying to turn away from having strong attractions and feelings towards members of the same sex.  Yes, I know this is condemned and all, and I can tell you that this issue is the only true reason I'm depressed.  It's not just the attraction though.  I really hate being a man – period.  All I want to do is please God, but if He doesn't make any mistakes, why couldn't He have made me a woman?  I would see then that I could satisfy Him and maybe have a little happiness inside of me.  All of this is what is making me feel frustrated.  (Oh, and I also know that everyone says that homosexuality is a choice, but I can assure you, I didn't choose to be attracted to men.  I lived a "normal" childhood with both a mother and father and was never sexually abused or anything like that).  Why is God making me suffer?

Sincerely,
Torn In Two

Dear Torn In Two,

Living a homosexual lifestyle is a choice – there is more debate over whether the attraction is a choice.  Feel free to read our article “Just Another Sin” to see more on the difference between homosexual attractions and living a sinful homosexual lifestyle.

Whether or not it is okay to be angry with God… it is normal – especially during times of great stress and trial.  Jonah was angry and spoke rashly with God, and God condemned him for it (Jon 4:1-4).  Regardless of how we feel, we must be careful to not speak rashly with or about God.  Like children with their parents, we can get upset, but we can’t be disrespectful.

You have a thorn in the flesh, a mental/physical problem that is causing you great distress.  However, God will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able (1 Cor 10:13).  Everyone has trials and weaknesses in various areas of their character and life.  Your temptation is one that you must fight just like any other… but take hope.  God causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him (Rom 8:28).  Many others have tried and succeeded in winning the battle against homosexuality.  You can too.  We cannot imagine the struggle you are going through, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be helped.  Through many tribulations, we must enter the kingdom of heaven (Acts 14:22).  This is your cross to bear, but you can do it (Lk 14:27).  If you would like a congregation in your area to get in contact with, e-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org, and we will help you as you reach out for help in your journey.

I do not believe people are born "gay".  Am I correct to conclude that because man was created in God's image (with free will to make choices in our lives), it wouldn't make sense that He would create some of us to live a lifestyle specifically condemned in the Bible?  Or is there a better answer given in the Bible to support this argument that people are not born homosexuals?

Sincerely,
Ain’t Talking About Being Happy

Dear Ain’t Talking About Being Happy,

Nobody is forced to have a sinful homosexual relationship.  The argument of the homosexual community is that they are born desiring people of the same sex and that they have no choice whether or not they act upon those desires.  That simply cannot be true.  God makes it clear that He will not allow us to be tempted beyond what we are able (1 Cor 10:13).  Even if someone is born with a predisposition toward homosexuality – they aren’t forced to act upon it.  We always have a choice.  There is always a way of escape from sin.  We often use 1 Cor 10:13 as a proof text that no one is born “gay”.

Homosexuality is like all other sins; we sin when we act upon the lust... after all heterosexual lusts get people into plenty of trouble, too.  Attraction is not the same as action.  God does not tempt us to sin (Jas 1:13).  It is our own lusts that entice us to do the wrong thing (Jas 1:14-16).  One person has a tendency toward anger, another has a tendency toward alcoholism, and some may in fact have a tendency toward homosexuality – but that tendency does not force them to sin.  We need to put away all filthiness of the flesh and be doers of God’s Word (Jas 1:21-22).

Is it wrong to go to a different church than your husband?  If I cannot convince my husband that the church we're attending isn't 'feeding' me anything and it's more of a social occasion than learning about God's Word, is it okay to go to a church I'm being led to attend?  My husband is a good man, but he goes to church to see other people, especially the men's breakfast before church where he 'cheats' on his doctor's orders to not eat doughnuts, sausage, etc.  I know he's not going to learn more about living under God's Word because he usually nods off within two or three minutes of the preaching!  So, as a wife, am I supposed to keep going to this lukewarm church, or can I go to another church I feel like I should be going to and pray for him to feel a desire to follow me??

Sincerely,
The Good Wife

Dear The Good Wife,

God makes it clear that we each have an individual responsibility to work out our own salvation (Php 2:12).  Only one relationship is more important than your marriage… your relationship with God.  In a perfect world, you and your husband would both seek the Lord with equal vigor and passion, but unfortunately it doesn’t sound like that is the case.  You have a higher responsibility to God above anyone else.  You must subject yourself to God’s wishes before your husband’s (Mk 12:28-30).

I don’t believe in God no more.  I needed prayers answered, and God turned a deaf ear to me.  I have done prayer requests at my church for years, but this year was so bad, I lost everything, and all I wanted was a few prayers answered, and God said, “No”.  So I have quit my church and believe God and all preachers are fake.

Sincerely,
Budding Atheist

Dear Budding Atheist,

We have no easy answers for you; it is obvious that you are hurting very much.  We would caution you in saying that God has turned a deaf ear to you.  God knows what you are going through – and there is a reason.  When Joseph was thrown into prison, he ended up being the king’s right-hand man (Gen 39:20).  When Moses was exiled to the desert for forty years, he ended up being the savior of all Israel (Acts 7:29-30).  Even Jesus proves that suffering can lead to victory; His death on the cross led to the forgiveness of sins (Heb 12:2).

Life here on this planet is full of heartaches, and we here at AYP cannot imagine how hard this last year has been on you.  2009 was a very difficult year for many, many people.  Just don’t forget that adversity can lead to victory.  No battle is won without bloodshed, and no bridge is built without sweat.  God causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him (Rom 8:28).

To complicate issues further, you are right on at least one point… many preachers are fake.  False teachers are rampant (2 Pet 2:1-2), and it may be that where you have been going has been plying you with false teaching that would discourage anyone.  E-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org, and we would be happy to help you find a congregation that faithfully teaches the truth.  It is through many tribulations that we must enter the kingdom of God (Acts 14:22).  We are so sorry for your suffering; don’t give up.