(This question is a follow-up to “Charles In Charge?”)

What is the role of the woman in the church?  Is she supposed to just sit and give tithes and offerings, or is she supposed to be active in ministries of the church?  The church is Christ's body, so the church is the people, right?

Sincerely,
Want To Be A Worker

Dear Want To Be A Worker,

Just because women don’t lead in the public assembly, doesn’t mean that they just take up pew space and write checks!  The Bible is chock-full of examples of active and vibrant godly women.  Lydia was a christian who took Paul and gave him lodging, food, and financial support (Acts 16:14-15).  Priscilla and Aquila were a married couple that taught the gospel to Apollos (Acts 18:24-26).  That same Apollos went on to become a mighty preacher… something that would have never happened without Priscilla.  John Mark’s mother opened her home for a prayer meeting that saved Peter’s life (Acts 12:11-12).

Older women are supposed to be teachers and train the younger women to be faithful wives and mothers (Tit 2:3-5).  Younger women have the immensely important task of raising godly children… the next generation of christians (Tit 2:4).  Women have children’s classes to teach, women’s classes to teach, hospitality to provide, others to encourage, and evangelism to do.

On top of all those very important and pivotal roles within the church, during the worship services, women have the task of singing and praising God (just like the men – Col 3:16) and joining in the public prayer… just because one man leads the prayer doesn’t mean we aren’t all praying together.  When the church assembles, we all are worshipping God, edifying each other, and studying His Word (Heb 10:24-25).

And yes, the church is the people – not the building.  The word ‘church’ actually means ‘the called out’.  The church is composed of those who have heard the call of Christ and have come out of the world to serve Him.

(This is a follow-up question to “Women Preachers”)

We are to remain silent and ask our husbands?  What about women's Bible study groups where we ask someone other than our husband a question?  Aren't we also, according to John, to cover our heads?  Is this not just a cultural bias of the time in which this was written?  There is no precedence that has made it past the Nicene council as to what books are canonical and which are not.  Did Jesus not love Mary Magdalene (and kiss her on the ...?), that somehow got written off as a prostitute, so that males can continue to dominate?  Why should it be that because God chose to make me a woman that I am second class to a man?  Why should it not be that He created me to be just as smart, capable, and able to lead as a man?  Doesn't God only care about our spirit and not our anatomical parts?

Sincerely,
The Feminist

Dear The Feminist,

Before we address your question, let’s get one thing straight – the Bible is complete, and there aren’t any books left out.  Read “Books of the Apocrypha” to better understand that topic.  If we don’t at the very minimum agree that the Bible is written exactly as God intended, we have no common ground with which to have a sensible discussion.  There is ZERO reason to believe that Jesus had a relationship with Mary Magdalene… that is just apocryphal mumbo-jumbo.

Now, on to your question regarding men’s and women’s roles.  You have a lot of disinformation that is coloring your question.  God doesn’t treat women as second-class citizens – they are equal heirs of salvation (1 Pet 3:7).  Women don’t need to have their heads covered – their long hair is their covering (1 Cor 11:15).  Women are also welcome to ask questions in Bible studies – the command of 1 Cor 14:34-35 pertains to the church assembly, not individual classes.  Men and women are created different, but equal.  God has designed men and women to complement each other – Adam and Eve were a pair that were incomplete if separated (Gen 2:20).  God doesn’t care about our gender… He cares about whether we are willing to fulfill the role He has given us in this life.

I hear a lot of people saying that men have authority: is that in a marriage, a relationship, just when the Bible speaks of authority… what is it referring to?

Sincerely,
What’s My Job?

Dear What’s My Job,

Men do not have authority in all situations, but they do have authority in some.  Men are authorized by God to be the leaders in the church assembly (1 Cor 14:34).  It is their job to lead prayers, lead singing, teach, and preach in the public church setting.  Men are also authorized to serve as elders, deacons, and preachers (1 Tim 3:2, 1 Tim 3:12, 1 Tim 2:12).

Men are also responsible to be leaders in a marriage (Eph 5:23).  Leadership in marriage does not mean bossing your wife around!  Being a leader means that he must set the tone and direction for the family and be spiritually responsible for his household.  The man must love his wife with a sacrificial love that always puts her first.  He must put the needs of the family above his own… just as Christ does for the church (Eph 5:25-29).

In short, all men are not in authority over all women… men only have specific authority in specific situations, such as marriage and the leadership of a local congregation.

I do not believe people are born "gay".  Am I correct to conclude that because man was created in God's image (with free will to make choices in our lives), it wouldn't make sense that He would create some of us to live a lifestyle specifically condemned in the Bible?  Or is there a better answer given in the Bible to support this argument that people are not born homosexuals?

Sincerely,
Ain’t Talking About Being Happy

Dear Ain’t Talking About Being Happy,

Nobody is forced to have a sinful homosexual relationship.  The argument of the homosexual community is that they are born desiring people of the same sex and that they have no choice whether or not they act upon those desires.  That simply cannot be true.  God makes it clear that He will not allow us to be tempted beyond what we are able (1 Cor 10:13).  Even if someone is born with a predisposition toward homosexuality – they aren’t forced to act upon it.  We always have a choice.  There is always a way of escape from sin.  We often use 1 Cor 10:13 as a proof text that no one is born “gay”.

Homosexuality is like all other sins; we sin when we act upon the lust... after all heterosexual lusts get people into plenty of trouble, too.  Attraction is not the same as action.  God does not tempt us to sin (Jas 1:13).  It is our own lusts that entice us to do the wrong thing (Jas 1:14-16).  One person has a tendency toward anger, another has a tendency toward alcoholism, and some may in fact have a tendency toward homosexuality – but that tendency does not force them to sin.  We need to put away all filthiness of the flesh and be doers of God’s Word (Jas 1:21-22).

Is it wrong to go to a different church than your husband?  If I cannot convince my husband that the church we're attending isn't 'feeding' me anything and it's more of a social occasion than learning about God's Word, is it okay to go to a church I'm being led to attend?  My husband is a good man, but he goes to church to see other people, especially the men's breakfast before church where he 'cheats' on his doctor's orders to not eat doughnuts, sausage, etc.  I know he's not going to learn more about living under God's Word because he usually nods off within two or three minutes of the preaching!  So, as a wife, am I supposed to keep going to this lukewarm church, or can I go to another church I feel like I should be going to and pray for him to feel a desire to follow me??

Sincerely,
The Good Wife

Dear The Good Wife,

God makes it clear that we each have an individual responsibility to work out our own salvation (Php 2:12).  Only one relationship is more important than your marriage… your relationship with God.  In a perfect world, you and your husband would both seek the Lord with equal vigor and passion, but unfortunately it doesn’t sound like that is the case.  You have a higher responsibility to God above anyone else.  You must subject yourself to God’s wishes before your husband’s (Mk 12:28-30).