According to the Gospels, the believers of Jesus would attain salvation through the words of Jesus.  Does this mean that salvation was not dependent on the shedding of His blood since it was stated before the crucifixion?

Sincerely,
Why Did He Die?

Dear Why Did He Die,

What Christ preached was that He would die for our sins (Matt 12:40, Matt 26:28).  Jesus said that it was His blood that would give people eternal life (Jhn 6:53-54).  Jesus said that all men would be saved through Him in anticipation of the sacrifice He was about to make.  Without the cross, Jesus’ words would have been empty promises.  Jesus even recognized the necessity of His death when He proclaimed “It is finished” with His last breath (Jhn 19:30).  Jesus did die on the cross, and His blood did pay for the sins of mankind (Heb 9:28)… thus finishing the saving work that He had been preaching about.

My sister recently lost her son (a twenty-five-year-old) to a bad car accident.  He was in the height of his life, recently engaged to be married, and doing well at his job.  Her grief has steadily increased.  She wants answers.  Why would God do this?  Why would He take such a good person?  Is He punishing her for her sins?

I am exhausted trying to find Bible verses or words of comfort for her.  Please help.

Sincerely,
Forlorn Aunt

Dear Forlorn Aunt,

This is a great question… which is why thousands of books have been written on the subject of grief. When Jacob heard of his son’s death and when he contemplated the loss of a second son, he said, “My gray hair will go down to Sheol” (Gen 37:35, Gen 42:38). That emotion is a normal one. When one learns of the death of a spouse or child, their first reaction is so painful and the grief is so deep that they feel they will never have another happy moment on this earth. Jacob’s first reaction was normal in this respect. Jacob later received the good news that his son was alive, so he didn’t have to go to his grave in pain.

But your question is about your sister today. How do we handle grief, so that we will be able to recover and find happiness again? This process of handling grief is called “Healing Grief.” It means we go through the grieving process in the right way, so we can heal. This is where those thousands of books come in, and I suggest your sister read many of them. Also, one of our AYP writers has an entire audio sermon series on grieving that he wrote when his wife died; that series can be found here.  Some of the major things most people need to do are:

1. Go ahead and cry your eyes out. Don’t be ashamed to express your pain by crying. (Ps 6:6-7)
2. If you have a friend who will listen, talk, talk, talk. Crying and talking are very therapeutic. Don’t hold it in! Cry and talk. (Eccl 4:10)
3. Cry out to God in prayer and listen to God as He speaks to you through His Bible, especially the book of Psalms (Phil 4:6; 1 Pet 5:6-7).
4. This next one sounds funny to someone who has not been through this experience, but those who have will know what I am saying. After a few months, you will realize that you don’t want to let go of your loved one. You don’t want them forgotten. You actually hope they might, in some way, come back. At this stage, you must accept the fact that they are gone. This is not easy, but it is a big step that is necessary to healing. (2 Sam 12:22-23)

When this acceptance actually comes into her life, she will begin the final period called ‘recovery’. It is at this time that hope will come back into her life, and she will find happiness again. She is going through a grieving process God built within us humans who are made in His image… so encourage her to not give up. Even Jesus Himself experienced this emotion (John 11:35).

I have studied in school about elderly people getting a “do not resuscitate” order for when they are past their limit and do not want to be kept alive by a machine.  I can fully see why someone would have one of these, seeing as how modern medicine values length of life and not so much quality.  I have even considered getting one of these when I get into the later years of life.  But I'm not sure if this would be considered scripturally sound.  I understand that God will take us when our time comes, and that it is all in His hands.  Yet, at what point is enough enough?  When I can no longer feed myself, so a feeding tube is inserted?  Or when I’m being kept alive by life support, but I have little to no brain function and can’t do anything but lie there waiting?  I would love to know where you stand on this.

Sincerely,
Preparing For My Funeral

Dear Preparing For My Funeral,

The act of purposefully taking your own life is definitely wrong, but refusing to prolong a terminal illness is a much murkier area.  There is no doubt that suicide is sinful (read “Victim Was The Assailant” for further details), but when someone doesn’t accept surgery, chemotherapy, life-support, etc. – that isn’t suicide.  ‘Do not resuscitate’ orders, living wills, and other such decisions are a matter of wisdom and conscience.

God very clearly teaches that we should be people who value life.  It isn’t our right to presumptuously choose the moment of our death (Eccl 8:8).  Just because we are suffering isn’t necessarily a reason to stop fighting for life.  Suffering can be a very important part of our life here (Eccl 7:14).  The general rule should be to seek to preserve life – even our consciences tell us this.  It is called the “survival instinct”.

On the other hand, there comes a point when continuing to poke, prod, and prolong the life of a body that is obviously dying can offend our conscience as well.  This is where wisdom comes in.  God tells us to ask Him for wisdom (Jas 1:5) and to make conscientious decisions (1 Tim 3:9).  There is no magic answer to your question – only principles to follow in a very difficult time.

How many times will God forgive me?  I’ve messed up many times and have repeated the same sin numerous times.  I always beg wholeheartedly for forgiveness and continue to try, but I keep falling, but I get back up, ask for forgiveness and strength, and continue to press on.  I know that one day I will finally conquer this sin through the glory and power of God, but I’m just curious if there is a limit at which He will stop forgiving me for the same sin, even if I truly want to stop.

Sincerely,
What’s The Quota?

Dear What’s The Quota,

There are two parts to your question:

1. How many times can I ask for forgiveness for the same sin?
2. How do I remove this sin from my life?

The answer to the first question is simple. You can ask for forgiveness an innumerable amount of times. Christ told Peter that we should forgive ‘seventy times seven’ (Matt 18:21-22). Paul was forgiven of his sins even after killing christians and actively persecuting the church (1 Tim 1:16). As often as we truly repent, God is ready to forgive (Lk 17:4). It is quite possible to truly repent of something and then find yourself doing that same thing not minutes later. It happens in arguments all the time! You say something mean, apologize, then find yourself upset again, and again use rash words. The repeating of the cycle is not necessarily an indication of false sorrow.

However, the second part of your question deals with stopping this cycle. God will forgive you for stumbling again into the same sin, but only if you are truly attempting to change your mind. Paul reminds us that we are to do everything we can to flee from the slavery to sin (Rom 6:1-2, Rom 6:12-13). Without knowing what sin you are caught up in, I can’t give specific advice, but I recommend getting help if it is as consuming as you say. Many sins can become addictions that are very hard to break. Here are some things to consider:

1. Are you trying to change all on your own? God says two are stronger than one (Eccl 4:9-10). In the case of sin like pornography, many people try and struggle through it alone without seeking help because of the shame involved in it becoming known. This rarely, if ever, works. Telling someone, even just one trusted friend, and using things like Covenant Eyes accountability software can make all the difference in such circumstances.
2. Are you putting yourself in compromising situations? People with drug and alcohol addictions are often tempted back into their old habits by drinking buddies or parties where drugs are made available. You may need to cut off certain people and habits from your life in order to escape that sort of sin. Remember, Christ said it would be better to remove even your own hand if it would free you from a sin (Matt 5:30).

Removing sin from our lives is a constant struggle. God is ready to forgive you ‘seventy times seven’ as you fight to defeat this sin, but you must look yourself in the mirror and make sure you are taking the steps necessary to change your life.

In your response, "What The Holy Spirit Does", are you saying then that the Holy Spirit talks to us, or rather, puts on our hearts things to say and do?

Sincerely,
Impressionable Heart

Dear Impressionable Heart,

We aren’t saying either of those things.  The Holy Spirit tells us what to do through the Bible.  The Holy Spirit told the apostles what He wanted for us to know (Jhn 14:26), and the apostles wrote it down, so we would always have the Holy Spirit’s wisdom (2 Pet 1:12-15).  Every verse is the Holy Spirit speaking to us (2 Pet 1:21).