5 minutes a day 5 days a week All the New Testament in a year

A while back, we had been talking about forgiveness and how you should keep forgiving people. What if they keep doing the same things to you and really aren’t sorry. How are you supposed to forgive then?

Sincerely, Hard To Forget

Dear Hard To Forget,

It is true that christians must forgive all other christians, but there is a difference between forgiveness and trust. David forgave Saul for trying to kill him, but David didn’t trust Saul after multiple attempts on his life (1 Sam 26:21-25). When we forgive someone, we no longer hold the debt of their sin against them (Matt 6:12); this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t use wisdom in our dealings with them (Matt 10:16).

Christians often forgive people for things they haven’t repented of yet. Stephen asked that God forgive the people that were stoning him (Acts 7:60). Jesus, our Lord, did the same thing as He hung on the cross (Lk 23:34). But in both cases, it is safe to say that the people they forgave weren’t trustworthy. Their forgiveness opened the way to the possibility of a healthy relationship over time. We must follow their example. You don’t know whether the person is truly sorry, whether they are trying to grow, or what problems or trials they are going through. God is the final judge of their character and faithfulness. You can and should always treat people with kindness and generosity no matter how they have treated you.

Continue to forgive and keep yourself from bitterness (Heb 12:15), but feel free to protect yourself from harmful relationships.

5 minutes a day 5 days a week All the New Testament in a year

I accepted the Lord Jesus as my Savior approximately nine months ago. When I became saved, I was in a sinful relationship. I was living with my fiancé (we are abstaining now) and am the mother of two children. He is the father of one of those children. What I am struggling with now is whether or not I am able to marry my fiancé.  He is a divorced man.  According to him, he and his wife divorced due to her committing adultery. I have never been married, and it is very important to me to have a marriage that is within God’s will and purpose for my life.  I don’t want to enter into a union that will separate me from His holy presence. Can you please provide me with your insight regarding this and help me understand why I might not be feeling God’s guidance in this situation?

Sincerely, Bride To Be?

Dear Bride To Be?,

The Lord tells us His will through the Scriptures (2 Tim 3:15, Eph 3:4), and no emotion or feeling should ever be our guide in things moral. That is why you haven’t been receiving any direct guidance in your situation… God already gave us all the answers in His Bible (2 Pet 1:3). Happily, the Scriptures are very clear in your situation.

Your fiancé is not married and is therefore available to get married. His prior spouse divorced him over fornication, which is the only permissible reason for divorce in the New Testament (Matt 5:32). In any case, he is no longer married to his previous wife. The divorce is long since final, and if he isn’t married – he isn’t married.

God certainly intends for marriage to be between one man and one woman for life (Gen 2:24). Having said that, God understands that, unfortunately, it doesn’t always work out that way (especially when people are living worldly lives). In John 4:17-18, Jesus recognizes five separate marriages that a worldly Samaritan woman had had. Jesus recognizes that in a sinful world, people don’t always make the choices God desires for them, and consequently multiple marriages do occur.

As a christian, you must understand marriage is for life. Regardless of past choices, if you and your fiancé get married… make it ‘til “death do you part.”

5 minutes a day 5 days a week All the New Testament in a year