I like this boy that is saved, and I have been wondering that if I love him now, will I still be in love with him while I'm in heaven?

Sincerely,
Big Crush

Dear Big Crush,

Romantic love, at least as we know it, will not exist in heaven.  Jesus says that there is no marriage in heaven (Matt 22:30).  Without marriage, there must be some sort of change in the relationships we have.  Love will certainly still exist once we enter the heavenly gates (1 Cor 13:8), but it will be different from what we have here.  Our relationships with others will change because we will change (1 Cor 15:51-52).

According to 1 Corinthians 5:9, we are not to associate ourselves with sinful people; how are we supposed to try and help them if we shouldn't be hanging around them?

Sincerely,
Love From A Distance

Dear Love From A Distance,

In order to understand 1 Cor 5:9, we have to read the rest of the chapter.  Chapter five of first Corinthians is dealing with a christian who had decided to return to a wicked lifestyle (1 Cor 5:1).  Instead of rebuking this sinning brother, the Corinthian church was accepting his immoral lifestyle (1 Cor 5:2).  Paul was rebuking the congregation for not disciplining this wayward christian.  The church has the responsibility to discipline willfully sinning brethren – we do this by not associating with them until they repent (1 Cor 5:11).  This responsibility is only in regards to those who are within the church – not those outside of it (1 Cor 5:12-13).  God wants us to spend time with the lost, so we might win them to Christ (Mk 2:16-17).  We are to live in the world (1 Cor 5:10) as shining lights (Matt 5:14) to those who don’t know Christ.

     Is it okay to clap after a baptism?

Sincerely,
Hand in Hand

Dear Hand in Hand,

This is an issue that good brethren disagree on, and really it comes down to the issues of culture, setting, wisdom, and reverence.  For the purpose of this answer, we will only deal with the wisdom of clapping after a baptism in the auditorium/assembly setting – not a private baptism situation.  Since this is a wisdom issue and not a doctrinal black-and-white teaching, there are no clear-cut answers, only principles to consider and guide our actions.  Here are some main principles to think about:

1. Everyone agrees that it is a good thing to be happy and rejoice when a person is baptized into Christ – after all, we are rejoicing that a lost one is now found, and even the angels are rejoicing at that moment (Lk 15:7).  It is completely appropriate to show joy and rejoicing at a baptism.
2. There is more than one way to show joy, and our expressions of joy are interpreted differently by the culture we are in.  David danced for joy (2 Sam 6:14), which was completely appropriate in that setting, but in today’s American culture, dancing after a baptism would be wildly inappropriate and mildly alarming!  The same with shouting for joy.  Though a shout for joy is appropriate at a sporting event, it wouldn’t have the same effect during a church assembly because the settings have changed.  There are many ways to express joy, but some expressions aren’t appropriate for certain settings or are misinterpreted by different cultures.  Which brings us to the third principle…
3. Whatever we do must convey both joy and reverence because of the setting and circumstance (Heb 12:28).  A football game touchdown whoop conveys joy, but it doesn’t convey reverence.  The concern many brethren have with clapping at a public baptism is the same – it is joyous, but it isn’t reverent.  This is where the issue gets difficult because every individual feels differently.  Some feel clapping is reverent; others don't.  It is a matter of opinion, not doctrine.

So, since the issue is one of opinion – how do we decide what to do?  Romans 14 gives us the answer.  Romans 14 deals with issues when good brethren disagree – one feels free to do something, and another feels constrained not to.  In such circumstances, the one who feels free should restrain himself for the sake of the other brother’s conscience (Rom 14:13).  When there are so many ways that we can express joy at a baptism (saying ‘Amen’, joyously singing together afterward, etc.), why bring grief to a portion of the brotherhood when it should be instead a time of rejoicing (Rom 14:15).  The issue isn’t clapping but unity at a time when we are adding another brother or sister to the church – now is not the time to offend each other but to unite and praise God for the lost one that He has found.

I put up with a lot when it comes to a certain person and his family.  Eventually, I completely cut everyone out of my life, and now I’m at peace... my question is: did I do the right thing by letting go?  Did I do the right thing by completely cutting everyone out of my life... or letting go the way I did, or am I supposed to continue to help and be there for them?  It’s hard for me to continue to associate with these people when, in reality, all I want to do is leave them in the past... especially when they go to the same church as I do.

Sincerely,
Cut It Out

Dear Cut It Out,

When dealing with trials amongst brethren, the biggest word we must watch out for is ‘bitterness’.  God warns us that bitterness creeps in and defiles us (Heb 12:15).  Bitterness destroys marriages (Col 3:19); it enslaves us (Acts 8:23); it changes the way we talk (Rom 3:14) and the way we think and feel (Jas 3:14).  If you are dealing with a fellow christian, there must be some redeeming quality within them that you could dwell upon (Php 4:8).  Be very careful to not close your heart off to others – if we won’t forgive, God won’t forgive us (Matt 6:14).  Bitterness comes across in the way we live – with all kindness, we recommend that you examine yourself (1 Cor 11:31) and see whether or not it may be time to soften your heart and let go (Eph 4:31-32).  Cutting yourself off from everyone in your life, especially the church, isn’t the answer.

Recently, my friend and I promised each other that if we saw the other turning away from God, we would speak up.  Basically, we promised to be each other’s support system and to encourage each other in God.  But I found out a few weeks ago that she has been sleeping with her boyfriend and some other similar things.  I would speak up, but she doesn't know I know because both her boyfriend and sister told me on accident; they thought she would have told me.  I know she is avoiding honesty because she thinks I will scold her and be disappointed.  I admit, I am disappointed, but I just wish she would be honest with me.  How do I handle this?  I don't want to cause fights by revealing to her who told me, but I want to be able to help her.  What do I do?

Sincerely,
A Concerned Friend

Dear A Concerned Friend,

If you know that a fellow christian is living a sinful life, you have a moral obligation to do something about it.  Christ says that we should privately confront one another (Matt 18:15).  If she repents, you have saved her soul (Jas 5:20).  Make it clear that you have honest and loving concern for her (2 Thess 3:14-15).  It is an act of love to entreat a fellow christian to turn from sin (1 Jn 3:18).  No matter how you came by the information, you have a responsibility to try and save your sister.