Why are some people who go to church stuck up?  They think they are better than everyone.

Sincerely,
Sick Of Being Looked Down On

Dear Sick Of Being Looked Down On,

You might as well ask why some people who go to work are stuck up, or some people who go to school are stuck up, or the park, or the zoo, etc.  In short, there are always going to be arrogant people in every area of life.  Arrogant people are not exclusive to religion, nor should we allow those few who make bad decisions to vilify the whole.

Just because you’ve been to a bad mechanic doesn’t mean you stop driving cars.  Just because you’ve had bad experiences with religious people doesn’t mean you should stop trying to find the truth (Matt 7:7-9).  There are congregations full of faithful, humble, Bible-loving people.  We are sorry for your frustration and the negative experiences you have had.  We would be happy to point you in the direction of a faithful congregation in your area that really does emulate the humility found in God’s Word.  If you would like help finding a faithful church in your area (not all churches are faithful), e-mail us at askyourpreacher@mvchurchofchrist.org.

Why are there fake christian people who say they are christians and do bad stuff?  They think all they have to do is to believe in God, and then they do want they want.

Sincerely,
Tired Of The Charade

Dear Tired Of The Charade,

There have been, and always will be, people who are hypocritical in their faith (Matt 6:2).  Make note of that behavior and remember to never be that way yourself.  We can’t do anything about others, but we can examine ourselves (2 Cor 13:5) and make sure that we are faithful.  Christianity is about more than just believing in God… even the demons believe (Jas 2:19).  Real christians combine their belief with works (Jas 2:17-18).  God wants more than just lip service… not everyone who calls on His name will be saved (Matt 7:21-23).  Don’t just look like a christian; live like one (Matt 23:25-26).

I was just curious.  What exactly does the Bible mean when it speaks of confessing our sins to one another?  When is it proper to confess to one another the sins we have committed?  When is it improper or excessive (if it can be so)?  When is it that this needs to be done?

Sincerely,
Confessionally Concerned

Dear Confessionally Concerned,

We must confess all of our sins to God (1 John 1:9) and be prepared to get help with our faults from other christians (Jas 5:16). When James talks about confessing sins to each other, he is talking in the context of prayer. His point is that when someone prays for you as you struggle with sin, that prayer will make an immense difference. He is not stating that you have to announce every single sin you have ever committed to each and every christian you meet.

There are definitely times to tell another person about your sin.

1. If you have sinned against them, you must admit it and ask for forgiveness (Lk 17:3-4).
2. If you believe the knowledge of your previous sin will help them (1 Tim 1:15-16).
3. If you are struggling with a sin and need help (Jas 5:16, Eccl 4:9).
4. If it would be deceptive to not reveal the sin (1 Jhn 1:8).

All of those situations constitute an appropriate time to confess your sins to another person. God doesn’t call us to parade our past sins before all we meet, but there is a time to own up to our faults before both man and God.

How are you supposed to treat a former member of the church after they have fallen away?  Say, for example, they want to meet up and take the kids to the park or catch a movie.

Sincerely,
Standing Up To The Fallen

Dear Standing Up To The Fallen,

When a brother or sister falls away, purposeful distance is our greatest tool to save their souls.  God tells churches to withdraw from brethren who deliberately return to a sinful lifestyle (2 Thess 3:6).  We should appeal with gentle and loving words in hopes of bringing them back to the Lord (2 Thess 3:15), but when that doesn’t work, we must show them our conviction by kindly, but firmly, refusing to keep company with them (1 Cor 5:11-13).  There isn’t anything that speaks louder than actions.  If you make it clear that the distance is done out of love and not out of hate… you will leave a message that might just cause them to reconsider.

Jesus never called us christians, so why does man?  I know where the name came from.  We have many names after being saved that are not ‘christian’ (Jhn 13:35).

Sincerely,
Don’t Label Me

Dear Don’t Label Me,

The name ‘christian’ is a Bible name.  In Acts 11:26, we see believers first using the title ‘christian’.  The apostle Peter uses that moniker for Christ’s followers in 1 Pet 4:16.  All in all, it is a wholly biblical term.