My wonderful husband and I are expecting our first child.  His parents are hoping for a biblical name.  My husband and I would like to name this baby after one of my grandparents, and none of them have names from the Bible.  My husband remembers his mother once saying that if a person doesn't have a biblical name, God doesn't approve of them.  There can't be any truth to this, can there?

Sincerely,
Hoping for Henry Or Pearl

Dear Hoping For Henry Or Pearl,

No, there isn’t any truth to this.  Many people name their children after people from the Bible, but our names do not define us; our actions do.  It is the memory of the choices we make in our lives that determine who we are; a name in and of itself is just window-dressing (Pr 10:7).  Even the church in Sardis relied too much on the reputation their name brought and was condemned for it (Rev 3:1).  Inversely, John the Baptist was given a name that had no meaning whatsoever to his family (Lk 1:60-63), and yet he was considered the greatest prophet of his day (Matt 11:11).  Name your children whatever you like, but make sure and train them up in God’s ways (Pr 22:6).  If they grow up and live faithfully, their name shall become a blessing.

I'm thinking of traveling internationally for a while.  I don't like having an itinerary to be tied to, so I'll just come and go when I feel like it.  Here's the problem: my mom thinks that I need to get my own job and move out.  I'm young!  I need to see the world.  Isn't there something in the Bible to show my mom that she's holding me back from true experiences?  (She's a Christian, so she'll believe whatever is in there).  I want to go as soon as I get enough for airfare, so a quick answer would get rid of the guilt she uses to manipulate me.

Sincerely,
Ready to LIVE!

Dear Ready to LIVE!,

Get a J-O-B.  If you won’t work, you shouldn’t eat either (2 Thess 3:10).  What if your parents had been “come and go when I feel like it” people?  If they had been that way, you wouldn’t have a stable home-life to mooch off of!  Bear the yoke in your youth and get to work (Lam 3:27).  When you have labored and strived, then you can enjoy the blessings of your labor (Eccl 5:18).  There is nothing wrong with traveling to see the world, but you should only enjoy that blessing after you’ve worked for it and gained the wisdom to do it properly.  The verse I would show your mother is, “Answer a fool according to his folly” (Pr 26:5); if you want to see the world, she should move you out herself, so you can see it authentically.

I am in my fifties, and my parents both have failing health.  They do not appreciate that my husband and I are religious and have made family gatherings miserable over the years because of it.  My siblings say that since we are the "good ones" (financially stable, our children turned out well, we are healthy), we should take over Mom and Dad's care.  I've mentioned to my siblings that our parents probably wouldn't want to live with us.  My brother said that we HAD to take them in because the Bible says to "honor your parents".  Does this burden really fall to my husband and me just because we're the only christians?

Sincerely,
Overburdened

Dear Overburdened,

It is an unfortunate reality that many christians are left with responsibilities that others are unwilling to shoulder.  Children have the responsibility of caring for their parents in their old age (1 Tim 5:4).  Certainly that responsibility falls to all of the siblings, but if none of the others will shoulder the burden, you would still be bound to.  There are many trials that christians must endure as they seek to live godly lives, and it sounds like this will be one for you.

Some parents make it a joy to honor them; others weigh down their children with the duty.  Your parents don’t necessarily need to live with you, but you do need to honor them (Eph 6:2).  You will have to decide what is the best way to care for your parents without destroying the stability of your own immediate family.

Luke 24:1-12 is the story about the women finding the empty tomb of Jesus. The Scripture identifies the women as Mary Magdalene, Joanna, and Mary the mother of James.

Women were the first ones to discover that Jesus had risen.  I was wondering how this speaks to the value of women in God's eyes and within Christianity. Also, even though the women did discover this first, it didn't seem important until Peter came and discovered that Jesus was gone.

Sincerely, Femininely Focused

Dear Femininely Focused,

Women are given great value within the Scriptures – exactly the same value as men. Indeed, it was women that first found the empty tomb (Lk 24:1-2). Entire books are written about faithful women (Book of Ruth & Book of Esther). Several women are listed in Hebrews chapter 11, the ‘hall of faith’ chapter (Heb 11:11, Heb 11:23, Heb 11:31). The fact that the news of Christ’s empty tomb didn’t begin to spread until His apostles began spreading the word of it, doesn’t make the tender act of the women bringing spices to His grave any less meaningful. His apostles’ report of an empty tomb would have carried more weight than anyone else’s.

The Bible is clear that men and women have different roles within the church. Men are to lead the congregation as elders and deacons (1 Tim 3:2, 1 Tim 3:12). Women are to teach in more private settings and by their godly demeanors (Tit 2:3, 1 Tim 2:9-10). Husbands are to lead their families in sacrificial Christ-like love (Eph 5:25), and wives are to bind together their families by their respect for their husbands and love for their children (Tit 2:4, Eph 5:24). Yet, in all these differences, God makes it clear that neither male nor female is greater than the other (1 Cor 11:11-12). They are equals and joint-heirs of salvation in Christ (1 Pet 3:7).

As stated in the fifth commandment, you are to honor your father and mother. Yes, as a child growing up in the home, children are to be obedient and respectful and do as their parents say - whether that be cleaning up the room or completing chores. Yet, I have heard it said that once that child turns a certain age or moves back in after college, the parents should have less control and say over that child. For example, the child should be allowed to come and go as they please. So how much do they need to listen to their parents? Yes, as a respectful person helping out around the house as they would do in their own home as well as picking up after themselves in communal areas as agreed upon. However, do they need to make their bed every day or clean their room to their parents’ liking? And do parents have a right to demand these things or threaten to take away their child’s personal things (things that the child has bought on their own) as punishment?

Sincerely, Too Old For Spanking

Dear Too Old For Spanking,

You are old enough to no longer heed your parent’s wishes when you are old enough to move out. The transition from parental oversight to honoring (but not necessarily heeding) your parents’ wishes is most visibly seen at the point of marriage. When someone gets married, they leave their parents and cleave to their spouse (Mk 10:7). Even if unmarried, when a child is old enough to “leave the nest”, it has the same effect as ‘leaving and cleaving.’ It sounds like your parents’ rules may be stricter than is appropriate for your age, but the fact remains that you are under their roof. Time has not made you equals, and they may have a good reason for those house rules. Take the time to understand their reasoning (Pr 23:22).

No rent, free food, free utilities, etc. gives them authority to set some ground rules regardless of age. If you are out of college and in your twenties, you have the ability to change that relationship… by moving out. Until then, you have a responsibility to abide by their house rules. Otherwise, you can always talk to them and hope to alter the house rules in a way that better suits both of your needs.