I’m so torn up inside!  Why can’t I stop sinning?  I really do try, and I succeed for a while, but then I fall right back into it.  I feel as if I’m slowly escaping this sin, but I still feel burdened by it, and I’m scared God will stop forgiving me.  I know it says in the Bible that God’s grace is endless, and that’s the only thing that leads me to succeed when I do.  I refuse to give up, and feel I am slowly winning the battle, but when I fall, I feel soooooo terrible.  Any advice?

Sincerely,
Repetitive Sinner

Dear Repetitive Sinner,

When a sin becomes so entrenched in your life that you are enslaved to it (Jhn 8:34), you are dealing with an addiction.  Addictions are formed by habits, and habits are formed by repeatedly making the same choices.  James describes this process in Jas 1:13-15.  All sins begin with a mental decision.  If you want to remove an addiction, isolate the choices that are putting you in the position to commit that sin.  If you change the environment and circumstances that lead you to a sin, you change the future playing field.  One of the easiest ways to do this is to let someone else know about your struggle (Jas 5:16).  There is strength in numbers (Eccl 4:12), and exposing a sin takes its power away (Jhn 3:20).

What is apostasy?  Is this the same as falling back into sin, but you can't come back to Christ?  Is there no forgiveness?

Sincerely,
Re-Admit One

Dear Re-Admit One,

Apostasy is when a church, group of people, or individual begins to teach something different than the Bible.  The word ‘apostasy’ comes from a Greek word that means ‘to fall away’ or ‘forsake’.  The Greek word for apostasy is used in 2 Thess 2:3 to describe false religion starting and tearing people away from true Christianity.  Apostatizing means that you have forsaken the truths of the Bible and have decided to follow a different path.  When people do this, they lose their salvation because the Word is no longer their guide (Jhn 14:6).

I've been dating a Hindu woman for about eight months.  I have fallen in love with her.  I would love to marry her, as she would be a great wife.  However, she is not a christian.  Over the months, we have talked about religion, and she has shown some (a little) interest in Christianity.  I know only God can lead her to Christ, so this is the question I pose.  Is it selfish for me to pray for her to be lead to Christ, so I can be with her?  I feel this is a self-centered prayer because I want her to be saved because I want to be with her and have a Christ-centered relationship… and not really because of her salvation.  I feel guilty and very confused.  I have prayed about this for quite a while, and I hope you will be able to shed some light on this issue.  Thank you.

Sincerely,
Praying To Propose

Dear Praying To Propose,

Why can’t you have both?  It is possible to pray for her conversion because you love her and want to marry her and so that she can go to heaven.  The two goals aren’t mutually exclusive.  In fact, we can’t think of a better win-win scenario.  God tells us to pray for the things we want but to also pray that His will be done (Matt 6:10, Jas 4:15).  In this case, you know that what you want is definitely the same as what God wants.  God wants everyone to be saved (Ezek 18:23).  Pray for her, be a good example, prepare ahead of time in your heart to never marry a non-christian, and be ready to answer her questions with logical Bible answers (1 Pet 3:15).  Hopefully, she has as honest a heart as you hope.

Hi.  I have this issue of feeling alone.  I'm twenty-six and male, and never have I once had a relationship with a woman.  I'm extremely lonely to the point where I would throw myself in a bad experience just to validate my existence.  I pray every night to God for help.  I usually get so lonely I end up committing sins like porn, masturbation, etc.  It's not because I want to; it’s because I do it out of habit from being alone for so long.  The longer I wait, the more I think my soul mate doesn't exist.  Every time I think I have a chance with someone, I always find out they’re in a relationship, etc.  I love God, and even with my flaws, God is with me.  It's just that I feel deep loneliness and a longing for companionship.

Sincerely,
Alone

Dear Alone,

You have eloquently articulated what is the root of your problem – loneliness.  Now it is time to take charge of your life and remove that loneliness.  When we desperately want a spouse, we can sometimes become myopic and forget that dating isn’t the only way to fill our lives with friendship.  The problem is loneliness; the solution is to get involved in peoples’ lives.  God tells us to replace bad habits with good ones (Lk 11:24-26).  By your own admission, you have the habit of being alone.  Get involved in the lives of others – go to church (we can help you find a faithful one in your area), socialize with people your age, hang out in public places like Starbucks instead of lingering alone at home, volunteer at local non-profit organizations like the food bank or the animal shelter.  In short, get out and get active.  You have no control over whether or not you are in a romantic relationship, but you have a great deal of control over how active your life is.