I love God, and I stand strong for my religion, but I have recently gotten into pot.  Does this mean I am going to hell?

Sincerely,
Dabbling In Drugs

Dear Dabbling In Drugs,

God is the judge of the living and the dead (1 Pet 4:5)… we cannot make the judgment on whether you will go to heaven or hell, but we can say that you are doing things opposite of what the Bible teaches.  Consuming marijuana for “recreational” purposes is wrong.  God created every green herb on day three (Gen 1:11-13), but He didn’t create them to be used inappropriately.  God condemns drunkenness and insobriety (Rom 13:13, 1 Cor 6:10).  If any drug, including marijuana, is used to create a state of drunkenness – then, yes, it is a sin.

God created everything in this world for our good, and He created us for good works (Eph 2:10).  Abusing the plants and herbs that God has blessed this world with harms us and is a sin.  When we don’t treat our bodies with respect, we harm ourselves as well as displeasing God (1 Cor 6:19-20).  Glorify God in your body and stay free of the damaging effects of drugs.

Why has no one ever asked me out?

Sincerely,
Feeling Ugly

Dear Feeling Ugly,

One of our favorite verses in the Bible is Ps 27:14 which says, “Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.”  When we are waiting for that right person to come along, and especially when we desperately want to be noticed and seen by the opposite gender, it can be an unbelievably hopeless feeling… but wait on the Lord, and all things will work out (Rom 8:28).  Your plight is shared by millions of other potential suitors, and there are several ways to deal with your unfulfilled yearning for affection and companionship, but only one way that is biblical.

1. Begin to act in a way that will garner attention at any cost.  This sort of desperate behavior leads to lots of attention, but the wrong kind.  God makes it clear that you want to be noticed for your lovely spirit, not your body (1 Tim 2:9).
2. Switch to “hermit mode”, and give up.  This also isn’t the right attitude.  Many bitter and forlorn hearts have been created because people gave up hope too early.  Be still and know that He is God (Ps 46:10); God’s plans are always better than our own.
3. Learn to be content where you are in life, and be the best person you can be (Php 4:11).  When we learn to live faithfully and trust the Lord’s outcome, we have success because He exalts us in due time (1 Pet 5:6).  This is true in every area of life, including waiting for the right someone to come along.

If a member of a church of Christ goes to a military branch, ends up fighting in a war, and kills men, will he still be a member of the church? And will he still be okay spiritually?

Sincerely,
Sgt. Unknown

Dear Sgt. Unknown,

There is nothing wrong with being a soldier; some of the most faithful men in the Bible were soldiers and had to kill people in the defense of their country.  David was a man after God’s own heart (1 Sam 13:14), and yet David killed many people as a soldier.  Jesus marveled at the faith of a centurion soldier (Matt 8:8-10).  The first Gentile convert was Cornelius, a well-known Roman soldier (Acts 10:22).  When a group of soldiers asked John the Baptist what they needed to do to live a faithful life, he told them to be honest and faithful… but he never told them to stop serving in the military (Lk 3:14).

Lord willing, most christian soldiers will never have to kill anyone, but if they did, it won’t be murder (read “Kill Or Be Killed” for more on that topic).  Being a soldier is an honorable profession.

My English is not so good, but I'll try to explain my question to you.  Two and a half years ago, my dad died.  He was everything to me.  I tried to move on with my life and make wise decisions, but it didn't work so well.  I have the wrong friends, and I got the wrong man.  Every day, I pray to God to help me.  I can't do it on my own.  I want to get a better life with hope, love, and happiness.  I think that God is punishing me for my mistakes in the past.  What can I do, so He will forgive my mistakes?  I am a better person now and have respect for all kinds of people.  I don't know what to do anymore.  Please help me.  Lots of love (name omitted) from Holland.

Sincerely,
Grieving Daughter

Dear Grieving Daughter,

We are so sorry to hear of your loss and the pain it has brought you.  The loss of a beloved parent is a great grief.  Your honesty is refreshing, and it also makes it a lot easier to answer your question.  No matter how much God loves us, He still allows us to suffer the consequences of our choices.  As you mentioned, you’ve made some bad decisions in the past, and you have surrounded yourself with unhealthy relationships.  God tells us that we “reap what we sow” (Gal 6:7).  That means that when we make bad choices, we pay the price for those choices – even if we are remorseful.  We appreciate your desire to rebuild your life and start fresh.  Part of a new start is to remove the bad influences from your life – bad company corrupts good morals (1 Cor 15:33).  Since you are in Holland, we can’t recommend any specific congregations near you, but we can say you should try and find a faithful congregation to attend (read “Finding A Church” for help with that), and if you aren’t yet, you should become a christian (read “What Must I Do To Be Saved?” for details on how to be saved).  We also recommend that you start reading and studying your Bible.  We have a lot of sermons online that you can listen to if you find it helpful.  You can find those sermons at mvchurchofchrist.org/sermons.  You are doing the right thing by trying to make changes in your life.  The more faithful changes you make, the better your life will become.  It does take time though.  You are in our prayers as you seek a new direction for your life.

Can a church or congregation be decorated with statues of goblins and gargoyles?

Sincerely,
Architectural Interest

Dear Architectural Interest,

Your question brings up a common misconception in today’s society.  When we look at how the Bible uses the word ‘church’, it never refers to a building – it always refers to a group of believers.  In fact, the word ‘church’ comes from a Greek word which literally translated means ‘the called out’.  The church is the group of people that have heeded Jesus’ call to repent and be baptized (Matt 28:19-20).

It is the misidentification of the church as a building that has led to increasingly ornate and filigreed places of worship.  Goblins, gargoyles, stained glasses, crystal, mahogany woodwork, and a thousand other extravagances have been placed within buildings because people have been taught that the structure is what is important… it isn’t.  The people are what matter – christians are the house of God (1 Tim 3:15).  The church, assembled christians, can meet anywhere they want.  They can meet in a park, a warehouse, a home, a rented building, or a purchased church building.  It doesn’t matter what the location is; wherever two or more christians are gathered together, God is there (Matt 18:20).