If my husband finds a job in Wyoming, and my life and family is in the state we live now, should I go with him?

Sincerely,
Change Of Address?

Dear Change Of Address,

A husband and wife are a family unit that has to be prioritized above all other family relations.  God commanded that when a man and woman married, they were to leave their families and become one flesh (Gen 2:24).  You and your husband must decide together where your life goes, and as a christian wife, you have a responsibility to follow your husband (Eph 5:22).  Hopefully, he will have a loving attitude to consider your wishes before relocating (Eph 5:25), but regardless of whether he does his part… you must fulfill your obligation before the Lord.  When you made your marriage vow, you and your husband decided to pursue a life together – wherever that life might take you.

Is watching pornography a divorce-able behavior?

Sincerely,
Looking For A Lawyer

Dear Looking For A Lawyer,

Though Matt 5:28 says that lusting after a woman is definitely a sin, it is discussing the attitude of lust and that it is the same as committing adultery in your heart.  The actual act of adultery hasn’t happened, but the attitude behind it exists.  If a wife/husband could divorce their spouse for thinking lustful thoughts, then we should also throw everyone angry with others in jail for murder (Matt 5:21-22).
The Bible makes it clear that the act of adultery involves two people becoming one flesh (1 Cor 6:16), and it involves more than just an act of the mind, but an act of the body (1 Cor 6:18).

     Can you divorce a spouse for committing homosexual acts with another person and remarry? If they don't technically commit intercourse because it's not physically possible, is it still adultery?  We are having a big debate on this subject at my church, and I would like some insight please.

Sincerely,
Divided Over Doctrine

Dear Divided Over Doctrine,

Matt 19:9 allows divorce for ‘fornication’.  Jesus never took the time to define what fornication was because the Jewish audience He was talking to had their Old Testament to read and could easily find out what fornication was by reading what the Old Testament said about the subject.  So let’s do what they would do!
Leviticus chapter twenty spends a lot of time talking about sexual immorality.  Sexual acts like laying with another man’s wife (Lev 20:10), incest (Lev 20:17), bestiality (Lev 20:15-16), and homosexual acts (Lev 20:13) all fall under the category of sexually immorality and are fornication.  So, yes, homosexual acts would be divorceable behavior.

The Bible mentions adultery once in a while, and Jesus says that if you look at a woman and have lust in your heart, you commit adultery.  This seems logical to me IF you or the lady are married.  If not, isn't it fornication?  Or is it classified as adultery?  This affected me personally quite heavily, and now I'd just like to do the right thing, but it doesn't seem clear.  Would marrying someone that has already slept with a couple of people but not gotten married be adultery?  Thanks for considering.

Sincerely,
Wedlock Wondering

Dear Wedlock Wondering,

In order for adultery to happen, there has to be a marriage.  There are two terms used in your question: ‘adultery’ and ‘fornication’.  Both are similar, but not identical.  ‘Fornication’ is defined as ‘sexual immorality’.  The definition of ‘adultery’ is ‘an unlawful sex act committed by a married person’.  All adultery is fornication, but not all fornication is adultery.  The only people that can commit adultery are people that are married (hence the word ‘adultery’… you are adulterating the marriage).  All fornication is a sin (1 Cor 6:18) and should be avoided at all costs – whether you are married or not.  However, technically speaking, an unmarried person cannot commit adultery.

Do you think in the case of forced or arranged marriages you are really married in God’s eyes, especially if you did not want to marry that person in the first place?

Sincerely,
My Parents Made Me

Dear My Parents Made Me,

If you made a vow, even one you regret… you are bound to it (Eccl 5:4-5).  What we here at AYP think doesn’t matter; what matters is what the Scriptures say on the issue.  Jesus says that our ‘yes’ should be ‘yes’, and our ‘no’ should be ‘no’ (Matt 5:37).  Christianity is about living as people of truth, and that includes telling the truth.  If you made a promise to remain married to someone, then you are married.